Thursday, November 30, 2006

if amateur philosophy bores you...

... turn back now!

it's going to come as no surprise to those of you who have spent any time with me over the last month or so that i've been in one hell of a funk. when the excitement and drama and exhaustion of the marathon wore off, all of a sudden i realized that i was stuck with just me again. no four hour long runs to distract me - no marathon glory to obsess over. and it turns out, i guess, that i don't much like being stuck with just me.

but running, for me, has always been a means of either running away or running to. lately, i think it's been about running away. i've been desperately planning long road trips and attempting to convince bridget to veer onto the highway on the way to school and take us far, far away from here. the "here," i thought, was a looming dissertation, conflict with professors, exhaustion, the city, etc. upon reflection, however, i think the "here" is actually me.

still, just as i was starting to despair over this sorry state of affairs, i decided to take my run today as a means of running to, not running away. i tried to cultivate mindfulness: being mindful of every out-breath. i let the thoughts drift from my mind and listened to the slap of my two feet against the pavement. in other words, i spent some time with me, in me. and i found that i wasn't nearly as scary as i had feared.

i would encourage all of you to try, for one day, running to. you just might be surprised at what you find.

3 Comments:

Anonymous corrado giambalvo said...

... Modifiable Flexibility Finding Based Acceptance... MFFBA... it even sounds like a degree... that's pretty darn amateurish :-) ...

... I am what I find of me, I can accept it or not, I can act to modify me, which means I will have to find me again, and accept it or not, and modify again to find again to accept again... on forever over Time...

The ACCEPTANCE sets the Rhythm (could be irregular on the short term, on the long term it could be an infinitely long unrepeatable interval) .... for the Base, makes sense that you further FINDing techniques (and Running Away may not work, but if you run far away enough it may work ((has it?))... and for the Melody, need to know how to MODIFY (like as in need to ask, read, study, improvise, test, experiment with some gradual sort of caution...

Greater FLEXIBILITY could/should avoid major pain or trauma...

Don't you just love SAP - Spontaneous Amateur Philosophy ? :)

yours truly, dr. Corrado, MFBA

5:12 AM  
Anonymous corrado giambalvo said...

MFFBA !!

5:13 AM  
Anonymous corrado giambalvo said...

... get anywhere :-) ??

5:01 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home